O Holy Night

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!
O night divine, the night when Christ was born;
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,
Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;
In all our trials born to be our friends.
He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger,
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
With all our hearts we praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
His power and glory ever more proclaim!

Unusual Christmas Message

This Sunday in church the text was from 2 Pet. 3, a chapter about "The Day of the Lord," judgment day. Not the usual text read for a Christmas message. So here is how it fits...

For the last four weeks, the sermons have had to do with Advent, a time set aside for the anticipation of Christmas. The first week's topic was "Longing." The text was Psalm 40 where the psalmist cries out, "How long O Lord?" It is an acknowledgement that all is just not right with the world and in our hearts and the desire for them to be made right. The second week was about the "Promise" from God to reweave the fabric of society, to make all things right, to put creation back as it should be, to restore the relationship with the people He created. The third week discussed the "Arrival" of the King to begin to fulfill the promise. It was the inauguration of His kingdom, the setting in motion to make all things right, beginning with the hearts of man. Jesus was sent by God the Father as God the Son, from heaven, to walk with us as humans, to weep with us, full of sorrow because of our sorrow and our sin. He took this burden on Himself, dying in our place, to make us whole and make things right with us in relation to God. We don't have to prove ourselves or do things to measure up to Him. There is no way we could. He has done it for us. We are covered by His blood alone.

So, now we are up to the fourth week, "Anticipation." It is the idea that Christ will come to finish His work. He has been working, is working and will complete His work on the judgment day. His kingdom was inaugurated when he arrived on earth 2000 years ago; He will return to consummate His Kingdom and to have His day of reckoning for all that is not and has not been right. He will make all things right! So, though we may have looked on the Day of the Lord with fear, if we are followers of Jesus, living a life of repentance, then we have nothing to fear. It should be looked to as a day of rejoicing because it will be the completion of all that God has done to make things right that have been messed up by us. What hope is there in Christmas and in longing and the promise from God if there is no final reckoning to deal decisively with all the injustice in the world? Without the Day of the Lord, there is not climax to the plot, no resolution to the storyline. This is the exclamation point at the end of the entirety of the gospel story.

So how does this affect our lives? This anticipation for the consummation of the Kingdom should give us a deep passion for the Lord! A diligence, a focus, a clarity of purpose to set our hearts on the holiness of God, to let our lives be a reflection of that and to speak the whole gospel story. It should resize us so that God is the main character, not us. It should encourage us to examine our lives daily and live with a repentant heart, not to perform for Him but because He has performed and finished the work for us.

I've never much thought about the Day of the Lord and am a complete skeptic with regard to so many people trying to predict when the end will be and that we live in end times. As a student of history, I've studied how bad all of history has been. The things that started out good get twisted. Our present age is not the inventor of evil. It has ebbed and flowed throughout history, hidden for a time but still working and thoroughly heinous and obvious at times. Every generation thinks they are living in the end times. However, in light of certain things in our own lives, I've been confronted personally with the fact that all is really just not right with the world, our country, our laws, etc. No government is perfect, nothing is. We expect things to work with swift justice and they simply don't. It has forced me to long for the day when all of this mess will be made right forever, when there will be no more orphans and no more fight for them and no more hunger and starvation and disease and extreme poverty and slavery and human trafficking. This anticipation should wake us up to these things, all the injustice and wrong in the world, and to cry out to the Lord to see and hear and work and to seek to help soften the blows of our fallen world but with realization that only God will finally put an end to it all, that we are not the saviors to end all of this, it is not our burden to carry. Christ, the Holy Child, is the Savior and Coming, Conquering, Victorious King.

Come, Lord Jesus Come!!!

Taylor's Table - Butternut Squash Soup with Chicken and Root Vegetables

I decided to finally cook one of the butternut squash I grew this year. I used some of it to make some baby food purees for Wes but I still had a lot left over. So I made something up! I had tasted a butternut squash bisque for babies that my neighbor makes as a business and thought it was delicious! I wanted to make something similar. This recipe was inspired by that baby food with a few additions! Don't be squeamish though. Give it a try first. I think you will really be pleased. The ingredients and directions may be a bit vague because I made this on the fly with what I had in the fridge.

• butter or olive oil (I think butter gives it a creamier flavor)
• 1 onion, chopped
• 2 carrots, chopped
• 1 parsnip, chopped (If you don't have this, you can leave it out but I think it adds a distinct and unique flavor to this soup!)
• 4 cups chicken broth? (I am not exactly sure how much broth I added!)
• 2 large new potatoes, cut up in 1 inch pieces and boiled or steamed.
• 2 cups or more butternut squash puree (I peeled the squash, cut it into pieces, cooked until soft, then mashed with a potato masher - or you can cut in half, lay cut side down in pan with a bit of water and cook at 350 until tender)
• 1 cup applesauce or cooked apples
• 1/2 - 1 cup shredded chicken
• Salt and Pepper to taste
• 2 TBS butter
• Parmesan Cheese

Heat butter in Dutch oven over medium-low heat. Add onions, carrots and parsnip and saute until tender. Add broth to the sauteed veggies. Add cooked potatoes, butternut squash, apples and chicken. Sprinkle with salt and pepper to taste. Bring to a boil, then reduce heat and simmer for 30 minutes. You may need to add more broth. Then puree with an immersion blender. Be careful not to burn yourself and wear and apron! When you are ready to serve the soup, add 2 TBS butter. Garnish with freshly shredded Parmesan cheese. Enjoy with a hunk of hardy bread and apple cider. ***This tastes even better left over!

* Thanks Randi for your inspiration!!!! :)

Launching "Sew Delighted"!

After over a year of thinking, planning, reading, buying, creating and praying, I am finally launching my little cottage shop called Sew Delighted. Thus far I have available napkins, notecards, cloth diapers and diaper doublers, and "half'-ghans. I also want to make cloth wipes/rags, baby quilts, and aprons, baby toys, and a few other things.

I am very excited about this opportunity because it gives me a creative outlet without a time crunch and because God has led me to use it to bless others by giving a portion of the proceeds to a ministry. (I will write another blog post later about this inspiration - I have so many blog posts in the queue in my head waiting to be written!!!)

I may eventually try out an etsy.com site but for now, I'm just keeping it here.

If you know anyone who'd be interested in any of these items, send them my way!

Hop on over to Sew Delighted - the link is also at the top of this page and is part of this blog site. You will learn a lot more there and see all the items for sale.

I would love your comments and suggestions!!!!

Taylor's Table -Pumpkins! Part 2

We've had a plethora of pumpkin dishes around here! Below, I've typed out a couple of more pumpkin filled recipes. Enjoy!

Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Cookies

(Makes 6-7 dozen, cut recipe in half for more manageable amount.)

* 2 cups butter, softened

* 2/3 cup sucanat (or brown sugar)

* 16 oz. can pumpkin puree or 2 cups

* 2 eggs

* 2 tsp vanilla

* 4 cups flour (2 cups whole wheat pastry flour, 2 cups whole wheat)

* 3 tsp cinnamon

* 2 tsp baking powder

* 1 tsp baking soda

* 1/2 tsp nutmeg

* 1/2 tsp allspice

* 1 tsp salt

* 2 cups chocolate chips

* 1 cup chopped pecans or walnuts (optional)

Preheat oven to 350F. Cream fat and sweetener. Add pumpkin, eggs, vanilla; beat well. Stir together flour and next six dry ingredients in a separate bowl. Add to batter; mix well. Stir in chocolate chips and nuts.

Drop rounded teaspoonfuls two inches apart on a greased cookie sheet. Bake at 350F for 18-20 minutes (check at 15 minutes! The original recipe said 12-15 minutes but they needed to cook much longer in my oven).

These don't spread out much and loose their crunch easily but are very tasty! Any suggestions for keeping whole wheat cookies crunchy?

* Adapted from a recipe at kitchenstewardship.com

Creamy Southwestern Pumpkin Soup

(These flavors are not the norm for pumpkin recipes but very delicious! Give it a try!)

* 2 Tbs butter

* 1 large onion, chopped

* 1 jalapeno, seeded and chopped

* 2 cloves garlic, minced

* 5 cups chicken broth

* 1 large baking potato, peeled and chopped

* 1 1/4 tsp salt

* 1/2 tsp chili powder

* 1/2 tsp chili powder

* 15 oz can pumpkin puree

* 1/4 cup fresh chopped cilantro

* 2 cups milk

* sour cream (optional)

Melt butter in Dutch oven over medium heat. Add onion, jalapeno pepper and garlic; saute 15 minutes. Add chicken broth and next 4 ingredients; cook, stirring often 30 minutes or until potato is tender. Remove from heat and let cool slightly (about 5-10 minutes). Use an immersion blender to puree all the ingredients of the soup. (If you don't have an immersion blender, you should get one! It saves so much time and cleanup!!!!! But if you don't heres' what to do - Process potato mixture, pumpkin and cilantro, in batches in a food processor or blender until smooth, stopping to scrape down the sides. Return to Dutch oven); stir in milk and simmer 10 minutes or until thoroughly heated, if needed. Garnish with sour cream if desired.

* Makes 10 cups (enough for lots of leftovers!)

Elisabeth Elliott Article

God has been teaching me more and more about dying to myself, especially since I have a little one around. (I'll write a blog about that someday soon!) I was looking for something else by Elisabeth Elliott, one of my heroes, and stumbled upon this article about how we think we are owed something and are so prideful and wrapped up in ourselves. I thought I would share it with you. Just click on the link to read it.

http://www.backtothebible.org/index.php/devotions/authors/elisabeth_elliot.html

Bathroom Remodeling

We decided a few months ago to redo our guest bathroom. It had been painted a purply mauve over top of old wallpaper. After many attempts at trying to remove the wallpaper without tearing up the wall board, we decided to just gut the bathroom. So that we did. We started the project at the end of August and are still working on it. It has taken much longer than we anticipated. There are so many details!!!!! Here are a few things that had to be done:

* redo plumbing

* install a fan in place of the can light that no longer had insulation on the wires - YIKES!

* Add a third switch

* remove all the old caulk off the tub

* replace rotted wood under toilet - perhaps the only thing holding up the toilet was the pipe under it!

* fill in holes in concrete - for some reason the floor of the bathroom was concrete under the tiles.

* put up new dry wall, mud the walls, let it dry, sand, remud, dry, remud, sand - over and over!

* prime dry wall

* mark out tile layout for floor and walls

* cut tiles, lay tile, let it dry

* grout tile, let it dry

* paint walls (finally! This is what started the whole project in the first place!!!)

* paint walls a different color - we hated the first color we picked

* sand, prime and paint beadboard

* cut and hang beadboard.

That is about where we are right now. There are a thousand other details all mingled in these larger steps. I am so glad that Eric is an engineer and thrives on these details. They've been driving me crazy. But I know it will look better since we have paid attention to these details. We still have to finish cutting and hanging the beadboard and there are a ton of finishing details still.

Here are some pics starting with the before picture, then the demo, then each step up to now.

A Bountiful Harvest?

This little amount of butternut and acorn squash, one ripe and one unripe pumpkin plus a handful of cherry tomatoes and tiny bell peppers, about 8 cucumbers and maybe 5 yellow squash and perhaps one meal's worth of bush beans and broccoli and a lot of lettuce (not pictured) were all that grew from the many seeds I planted in my garden this year. (Actually, I had tons of beans and broccoli but I didn't get out there and pick it when I should have).

However, I am amazed! I did virtually nothing to these plants! (I was throwing my attentions elsewhere - also pictured protecting the bounty! He is certainly thriving!) I occasionally watered them even though it was a dry summer compared to last year. Almost everyday I peered out the window to see their large leaves wilted under the heat. Poor things. I didn't give these plants any fertilizer except when I planted them - I threw an unmeasured amount of compost in the hole. All the squash and pumpkin vines were being eaten alive by a squash borer but they continued to grow, even up into a tree-like weed that grew 15 feet overnight! In fact the largest butternut squash I found at eye level hanging on a branch of that weed-monster. The butternut squash vines, despite their boring intruder, grew to at least 15-20 feet! The leaves were mottled and unhealthy looking but they still managed to produce about 10 butternut squash. I had completely given up on the acorn squash. In fact I thought they were dead. Then suddenly, there were four little squashes! They grew to a healthy size and the plant even looked healthy.

Here is my herb "garden." It was actually quite productive even though I didn't do anything to it either, literally, even less than with the vegetables. It is hard to tell here but I grew basil, oregano, marjoram, mint, chives, and parsley all around one of my knockout roses that I also did nothing with except to cut some flowers every now and then. I also have a pot of rosemary and sage but they aren't pictured. I found that the more I picked my herbs, the better they grew. They got fuller and greener. So the more I picked, the more there was to pick!

Even though I didn't get nearly as much produce out of my garden as I could have I certainly got enough herbs and winter squash to last a long while. Not bad for doing so little. I don't write all this to show how much you can get away with by doing very little. Not in the sense that I want to share that as a life lesson. And this is nothing to boast in or be proud of because I did nothing. And I certainly don't take pride in doing nothing.

I simply want to encourage you that growing vegetables isn't too hard. Granted, it can be extremely time consuming and you will hopefully have a huge harvest to show for it. But on the other hand, if you are just wanting to try it out and don't have a whole lot of time, you might actually get something for a minimal amount of labor and lots of enjoyment. It is so fun to go out and see a pumpkin on your vine!

I think winter squash, cucumbers, herbs and lettuce are about the easiest things to grow with little effort. However, I have never been able to grow herbs from seeds! I just buy the tiny plants early in the spring. If you bring them inside during the winter, they will stay alive and then you won't have to buy again the next year. Also, don't plant too many things. That seems to be my problem each year so that it is all too much to handle and none of it gets the attention it needs. Pick a few things, become an expert in them and then add something else after a couple of seasons. (I need to take my own advice in this!)

So go for it and be delighted in the fruits of your labor, whether it be a lot of fruit with a lot of labor or a little fruit with a little labor!

Taylor's Table - Pumpkins!!! Part 1

Note: I am changing the title of this series to Taylor's Table and will try to post once a week, but not necessarily on a certain day each week.

I love autumn! There's something about the crispness in the air and the brightness of the sky that makes me feel energetic and nostalgic. For some reason, fall makes me think of decades and centuries ago when people were harvesting roots and squash to keep for the winter in order to survive. Today I started reading Little House in the Big Woods by Laura Ingalls Wilder (I read this series every few years to remind myself of the simplicity of life and how happy we can be with very little - here's a good link that talks about this). By coincidence, Laura shares in the beginning of the book some of her family's fall activities:

Now the potatoes and carrots, the beets and turnips

and cabbages were gathered and stored in the cellar,

for freezing nights had come.

Onions were made into long ropes, braided together

by their tops, and then hung in the attic beside wreaths

of red peppers strung on threads. The pumpkins and the

squashes were piled in orange and yellow and green

heaps in the attic's corners.

The barrels of salted fish were in the pantry, and

yellow cheeses were stacked on the pantry shelves.

She goes on to explain how Pa had killed a pig and deer and how they cut them up and smoked them over hickory chips in his log smoke house.

Don't worry, I am not going to teach you the intricacies of killing a pig and preparing the hams for the smoker. This is about pumpkins. I LOVE PUMPKINS! I even tried growing a pumpkin vine this year. One small pumpkin grew from it (pictured above). It is amazing how excited one can get over a small pumpkin growing in the backyard! I was so proud of it though I have no reason to be because the pumpkins were supposed to be profuse and large. I did absolutely nothing to the vine except water it occasionally. It a miracle that anything grew at all! Strangely enough, another one is now growing but I don't think it will be ripe before the frost.

So anyway, I have a few delicious pumpkin recipes that I want to share with you this week and next. I've tried many versions of these and at last have found ones I really love with a bit of my tweaking. (I can never leave a recipe alone!) Enjoy!

Pumpkin Waffles

2 cups flour (I used a mixture of buckwheat, white and whole wheat flour)

1/2 tsp salt

1 1/2 tsp baking soda

2 1/2 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp ginger

1/2 tsp cloves

1/2 tsp nutmeg (or to taste - I don't like too much of this)

4 eggs

1 cup buttermilk (I used 1/2 cup yogurt and 1/2 cup milk mixed together)

1 cup pumpkin puree

2 TBS honey or molasses

1 tsp vanilla

In a large mixing bowl, combine dry ingredients and spices. In a separate bowl, whisk together eggs, buttermilk, pumpkin, and honey. Gently stir liquid mixture into dry mixture. Cook on waffle iron until deep golden brown (5 minutes worked well for us), and serve immediately.

* Serves 6-8 depending on appetites.

* Adapted from this recipe at Frugal Granola.

Pumpkin Bread

1 1/2 cups flour (I used 1 cup whole wheat flour and 1/2 cup whole wheat pastry flour)

1/2 tsp salt

1/3 cup rapadura sugar or sucanat

1 tsp baking soda

1 cup pumpkin puree

1/2 cup olive oil

1 tsp vanilla

2 eggs beaten

1/4 cup water

1/4 tsp nutmeg

1 tsp cinnamon

1/2 tsp allspice

1/2 cup chopped walnuts, optional

1. Preheat oven to 350F. Sift flour, salt sugar and baking soda.

2. Mix together pumpkin, eggs, oil, water, and spices. Then combine with dry ingredients, but not too thoroughly. Stir in nuts, if using.

3. Pour into well-buttered 9x5x3 in. loaf pan. Bake 50-60 minutes until skewer comes out clean. Turn out of pan & let cool on rack.

* Makes 1 loaf, can easily be doubled, or be made into muffins, just cook for less time.

* Adapted from a recipe at Simple Recipes from elise.com.

Pumpkin Scones -

Not super sweet but super Delicious!!! Scones aren't supposed to be sweet anyway! The other day I picked up a scone at a coffee shop thinking it would be the least sugar-fied item but it tasted like a donut!!!! They are supposed to be more like biscuits. Oh what we Americans do to good food!

1 cup whole wheat flour

1 cup whole wheat pastry flour

1/4 cup rapadura or sucanat or light brown sugar

1/4 tsp ginger

3/4 tsp cinnamon

1 tsp baking powder

1/2 tsp baking soda

1/4 tsp salt

1/2 cup cold, unsalted butter cut into small pieces

1/3 cup or more raisins, or chopped dried apples

1/4 cup toasted pecans or walnuts, optional

1/2 cup buttermilk

1/2 cup pureed pumpkin

1 tsp vanilla extract

Pumpkin Scones: Preheat oven to 400 degrees F (200 degrees C) and place rack in the center of the oven. Line a baking sheet with parchment paper. In a large bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, spices, baking powder, baking soda and salt. Cut the butter into small pieces and blend into the flour mixture with a pastry blender or two knives. The mixture should look like coarse crumbs. Stir in the raisins and pecans, if using. In a separate bowl mix together the buttermilk, pumpkin puree and vanilla and then add the buttermilk mixture to the flour mixture. Mix just until the dough comes together. Do not over mix. Transfer to a lightly floured surface and knead dough gently four or five times and then pat the dough into a circle that is about 7 inches (18 cm) round and about 1 1/2 inches (4 cm) thick. Cut this circle in half, then cut each half into 4 pie-shaped wedges (triangles). Place the scones on the baking sheet. Brush the tops of the scones with the egg wash. Place the baking sheet inside another baking sheet to prevent the bottoms of the scones from over browning. Bake for about 20 minutes or until golden brown and a toothpickinserted in the middle comes out clean. Transfer to a wire rack to cool. Makes 8 scones.

* Adapted from this recipe at joyofbaking.com

Tuesday's Table - Homemade Apple Sauce

I started making applesauce last year when I realized how easy it could be and found some great looking apples at our local outdoor market. This stuff is GOOD and EASY! Here's how to make it.

*** Gather 10-12 (or however many will fit in your crockpot) apples of different varieties. The last version I made had a few granny smith's, a few cortlands, a couple of honey crisps, a few golden delicious, and a few galas. Peel these, if you like. You don't have to! Then, chop into one inch or smaller pieces.

***Dump the apples into your crock pot. Pour in about 1/2 cup of water or pure apple juice. Turn the dial to low and cook until apples are tender, 5-8 hours.

*** Use a potato masher to turn the apples into chunky sauce. Serve up in bowls and enjoy. This makes about two quarts.

***You'll notice this has no sugar or spice. I think you'll find you won't need it. Give it a try first before adding anything.

Taylor Tot Blog Not Moving!

I've decided not consolidate Wes's blog and mine. So click on over to his blog to see the updates!

www.wjtaylor.blogpsot.com

Tuesday's Table - Yogurt Mix-ins

When I was very young I hated yogurt. However, over the years I have grown quite fond of it - of the flavored kind, that is. While living in Lebanon pre-flavored yogurt was too expensive for us, not to mention the high sugar content along with other highly processed ingredients, so I tried to acquire a taste for plain yogurt. It worked to some extent. Sometimes I want to eat just plain yogurt, but I prefer a little flavor to tame the tartness. So this is the solution I came up with eventually.

I buy whole milk yogurt, mostly organic depending on the budget, or I make it at home. I also buy frozen fruits like strawberries or blueberries or raspberries. I let these thaw out and then toss them in the blender until they are pureed. Next, I pour the fruit purees into ice cube trays and freeze them. After freezing the individual cubes, I dump them into freezer bags to store. So when I want some fruity yogurt, I pull out a couple of cubes of fruit, thaw it in the microwave for 30 seconds or so. Then I mix in some yogurt to the thawed berries and dig in. Mmmmm....

Here are a few more simple ideas -

* Mix in crushed pineapple (I know it's canned but I figure it is better than the packaged pre-flavored yogurt - it is just pineapple in it's own juice.) with a bit of juice with the yogurt.

* Mix in a bit of maple syrup.

* Add a bit of vanilla and maybe some cinnamon or nutmeg.

So now when I eat pre-flavored yogurt, it is too sweet, I don't like the texture and it really doesn't even taste good.

Also, making plain homemade yogurt is fairly simple. Heat a quart of milk slowly to 180 degrees F. Then, let it cool to about 110 degrees F. This can take an hour or so. Next, mix in a 1/4 to 1/2 cup of yogurt. You can also add a TBS or two of powdered milk but you don't have to. If you have a yogurt maker, you simply pour the warm yogurt mixture into the jars provided, place them on the warmer, put the top on and set the timer for 8 or 10 hours. If you don't have a yogurt maker, you can simply pour the mixture in glass jars, wrap with a towel and keep in a warm place - the attic in summer is a great place, or in a cooler with a pot of boiling water. Let it sit until it looks solid.

Walah! You have tasty yogurt. You can tell that it is not an exact science. You really can't mess it up. I haven't had a bad batch yet. Sometimes the consistencies are different but I've never had just curdled milk. It always has that yogurty tartness which means it has all those millions of good bacteria our digestive tracts need.

Have fun experimenting!

Tuesday's Table

I've been wanting to write for months and months about some of the things I do around the kitchen to make our cuisine more wholesome. Finally, I'm going to do it. I thought it would be nice to try to post something on Tuesdays. Now, if you know me, you know that doing something consistently every week is a bit of a stretch, so that is why I was less vague by saying "on Tuesdays" not "every Tuesdays." This is just an intro to the way we eat and why. I'll start posting recipes next Tuesday, hopefully.

Over the last several years, I've been trying to eat more healthy realizing that what I eat directly affects my health in many ways. For I while I had developed hypoglycemia, had terrible insomnia, recurring sinus infections and still do struggle with infertility among a few other things. In an effort to try to get rid of these things, I have tried a myriad of different foods and "diets" most of which made me feel worse.

A few years ago I came across an entirely different attitude in what healthy eating means. My friend introduced me the cookbook Nourishing Traditions by Sally Fallen and the corresponding website westonaprice.org. In a nutshell, this book and way of eating is based on the research of traditional food ways of groups of people with extraordinary health all over the world. What it boils down to is eating food at its most nutritious in the least processed way possible. It encourages eating whole, natural, real food - no low fat, no fat, low carb, etc - since that would mean it has been highly processed. The idea is that food is more nutrient dense and nutrients are more easily absorbed when eaten as nearly as it is found naturally than any processed food. It encourages eating whole milk (raw is most desirable), whole yogurt, natural cheeses, real eggs, whole soaked grains, real broth and lots of it, soaked and roasted nuts, lots of lactofermented foods, lots of fruits and vegetables, the whole animal - organ meats included, especially the liver, and cutting out all kinds of processed sugar and sugar substitutes.

So, I've been slowly trying to work toward this end. These are the things that I've been incorporating more and more. We drink whole milk (not ultra pasteurized), eat whole fat yogurt, aren't afraid of eggs, I make homemade broth, I sometimes soak my grains, we've been trying to cut out boxed cereal in the morning and most boxed and canned foods. We still buy boxed pasta, canned tuna, salmon, pears, pumpkin, green chilies and tomato products. Getting rid of the cereal has been the hardest so far, because it is so convenient! I'm desperately trying to find an easy solution. We've switched to Rapadura sugar, the most unprocessed sugar available, and we try to use it sparingly. We also use only raw honey and real maple syrup. (This is like gold in our house). We use only butter, olive oil and coconut oil for baking and sauteing. In doing so, I feel much better and we hardly ever get really sick now.

My goal in all this is of course to eat whole, real food and to do so as cheaply, conveniently and as easily as possible. So these posts on Tuesdays will be the result of lots of research and trial and error and experimentation. I hope you find this helpful, tasty and enjoyable.

In His Rest

Every time we lay Wesley down for a nap or bedtime we pat him on the back or side for a few minutes to settle him. Lately, I've started patting some and then just resting a slightly firm hand on his back or shoulder or bottom to help settle him more.

The other day I was thinking about this with regards to our walk with Jesus. I know the Bible speaks of resting in Him and of His hand upon us. He wants us to rest in Him but so often I squirm and fuss and try to keep my eyes open so to speak. I think very often in my life God is gently saying, "Shh" to me and pushing a little more with His hand to make me rest in Him. The difference between me patting Wes and putting my hand on him and God's hand on us is that I don't stay there for his entire nap! However, God's hand is always upon us. He is so trustworthy and such a good, good Father. I pray that I won't fight against Him so much with my fears, worries, anxieties, complaints, fussing and my tendency to need to be in control of all things at all times. I think God is seriously trying to break me of that and to trust and rest in Him always.

Here's a song we sang in church a few weeks ago. The words are quite fitting for our life right now.

Petition - Anne Steele, Sandra McCracken, Chelsey Scott

"Give me a calm, a thankful heart,

From every murmur free,

The blessings of thy grace impart,

And make me live to Thee.

You raise your hand to still the storms

That rage inside my head;

Revive my heart with gratitude,

Love, quell my doubt and dread.

Give me a sure and rested soul,

From every fear relieved,

Thy Spirit's power and presence mine,

To ever comfort me."

The Black Purse

We are in the middle of a 30 day waiting period regarding legal protocol for Wesley's adoption. It is something that is required in many states these days but it sure is nerve racking! I thought that the 30 days started when Wes turned 6 months old on August 16 but actually it didn't begin until August 30. So for two weeks I was anxious for no reason and then I found out that the anxious period has to draw out even longer!!!! ARgggh! Wesley is such a precious gift and a sweet little guy. I can't imagine not having him. When we found out the time period was two weeks off what we had thought and that we had to wait that much longer, Eric and I were pretty crushed.

It seems like this spring and summer have dealt us some difficult blows and this added to the list. We've been desperate for godly fellowship in this time but it seems to be alluding us. We so miss the continuous wellspring of spiritual encouragement in Norman! So we've found a church that we really like though it is quite a distance further than we'd prefer. We were so pumped about getting involved in a small group from the church starting up next week very near our house. However, true to all the other little and large disappointments these last several months, yesterday we've found out that they have had too many people sign up for the groups. Now, this is not a bad thing at all! It is amazing that they had 475 slots and 600 people signed up! (this church is only 2 years old!) However, they had to give the slots to the people who had been going the longest. That would not be us. :( There is another option for us but it just delays that much longer what we've so much been longing for. So, we were even more crushed last night.

I don't mean to have a pity party. Per usual, God has really been so gracious to us in this time. He's been teaching me so much about myself and about Him. Eric and I have drawn even closer to each other. It seems God is just clearing away more weeds in our lives.

So where does the title, "The Black Purse" fit into all this? Well, just after we found out we had to wait longer for the 30 days to be up Eric said, "Remember the black purse." He didn't need to say anything else. Here's the story:

We had three days left in Lebanon in 2008. We were at the end of ourselves completely - not much left in our reserve. However, we had been given the opportunity to go back down south to visit the people we had come to love so much over the past 8 months. And then we visited a very poor area on the coast as a means to be a light to the community. It was a great time but nonetheless we were still exhausted, emotionally spent and ready to return to the US. We took a bus back from the southern coastal town to Beirut with our bags and other paraphernalia in tow, stopping to change busses half way through the journey. After traveling for probably almost two hours, I realized that I didn't have my tiny black purse. With all the other bags we were carrying, the black purse was forgotten. Forget the money and credit cards it contained - more importantly it contained my passport!!!! I could not leave the country without it. We had plane tickets and were virtually packed and we couldn't leave the country!

We made several different phone calls trying to figure out if we could find the purse. When those came up a dead end, we called the embassy to try to figure out what to do. It seemed that the process could take up to two weeks! Oh brother! I totally melted. I took a shower and cried and cried and cried.

However, when I got out of the shower I heard Eric trying desperately to speak Arabic with a guy named Mohammad. Turns out, when we changed busses, someone had found my purse when they got on the bus. They gave it to the driver who in turn gave it to the bus station office. In my purse, they found a doctor's bill that had the doctor's phone number on it. They called the doctor's office to get my phone number. The doctor's office gave them my number and so they called us!!! Would that ever happen in America? The people who found the passport realized that it would be pretty important for me to have my passport and wanted to get it to me! Amazing! All along we thought it would be found and confiscated for some back ally plot or something crazy like that - this is where your mind goes when you are absolutely out of everything in your heart, soul and body and you've been living in a politically tense country! This shows what most Lebanese people are really like even in a pretty radical city that is not too fond of America.

The next day one of our friends who could speak very good Arabic was heading to the city where we had changed busses and retrieved the black purse for us. Hurray! Everything in the purse was in tact along with the passport and the doctor's bill, which I have kept for memories. (There's more tied up in that bill than just getting the passport back). However, the black purse was quickly retired when we returned to the US. It rests in my closet. I can't seem to throw it away. Eric will not ever let me buy a purse so small ever again. I guess I have to agree with him.

The Black Purse was a lesson in trusting completely in the will of God when we have absolutely no control over a situation. God could have chosen not to let us retrieve the passport but I am positive there would have been a good story with that outcome as well. So now, whenever we find ourselves in a situation that we can't control, all it takes is a mention of the black purse to bring us to our senses about God's hand on our life and that we are in His hands. He's trustworthy regardless of the situation, regardless of the outcome.

Fresh Eyes and Random Thoughts

This is just a bit of rambling from some thoughts from a Bible study Eric and I have started.

Eric has had a heart while at work to reach out to anyone with the gospel. He feels very inadequate about this but he amazes me. Frequently he comes home telling me of great spiritual conversations he's had with coworkers who are seeking to understand who Jesus is and exploring the truth of Christianity. As a result of regularly talking to some of the guys he works with he decided to start a kind of Bible study. We started doing this several months ago and have met on and off each week since. We are reading through the book of John. Eric facilitates the reading and the discussion, asking some of the same general questions each week like, "What does the passage tell us about Jesus, about God, about man, and about ourselves specifically?" And, "As a result, if this is true, how are we to respond to what we've learned?" The discussion has been so good that we almost always go past the hour and a half we have allotted and have still only made it to the end of John 4.

Since I am of a bit older generation and have spent most of my life around believers in the United States (overseas I was mostly around nonbelievers but the cultures and mindsets were completely different). Spending time with these few "seekers" has opened my eyes more to the philosophy of life in today's world. I've read some about this but it doesn't compare to listening to these guys and gals think out loud. I recognize that they are only a few in a sea of many but I think they fit a different mold than what we try to put people into. In visiting so many churches in this area trying to get settled, we've discovered so many that cater to what they think people want to hear so they will come to church. However, according to our Bible study group, this is not what they want. They want to see real worship not entertainment. They are deep thinkers. They want depth of teaching about the Bible, not something that just makes you feel good about yourself. They want real, meaningful relationships and conversations in the midst of our text-messaging, facebook, twitter world. They want an avenue to ask hard questions and not be blown off. And they want people to be real in answering the questions, who can truthfully say, "I don't know." They want conversations with people who really know the Word but don't flaunt it. They want to see faith and truth played out for real, with humility - not with perfection - in those who proclaim to follow Christ, so that they stand apart from the rest of the world. They are super smart and know when they are being catered to.

It has been really refreshing and challenging to be around this group. Each week I walk away contemplating my own walk with the Lord based on some of the profound comments they've made. It has caused me to reexamine much of my heart and attitudes and actions. I've even started reading the Bible differently, trying to see it with fresh eyes and looking at it much more deeply, asking some of those same questions that Eric asks as well as pondering some of the comments and questions from the group. It has made a big impact on my walk with the Lord.

I've learned a lot about the simplicity of teaching the Bible and discipleship through this group and it has confirmed what we experienced in Lebanon. We've read so many books about discipleship and listened to many sermons on the subject. We've tried those methods and though there are good parts, it often feels contrived. In our experience in Lebanon and with this Bible study, the best kind of disicpleship is simply reading the Bible together, mulling it over together and sharing life together. The Bible speaks for itself and it tells us how to live the Christian life. We don't need anything else, except of course the Holy Spirit to guide us.

It has also shown us that people are everywhere who are open to the gospel, you just have to put yourself out there to start conversations and share your own life with people. In Matt 28:19-20, we are called to take the gospel to all nations including our own, including our coworkers and neighbors. Of course, I am not advocating not going to other nations, (if you know me at all, you know I would Never advocate not going to other nations!) just that where ever God has you is a mission field.

What has been so neat is seeing the Word read through fresh eyes. Each week I am blown away by the profoundness of their thoughts and discussion about life and the world and even Christian faith and Jesus and humankind that they pull out of a passage that I had NEVER thought of. One guy made a comment a while ago that has stuck with me, that I keep going back to and thinking about as I read things in the Word or watch others who say they are believers. He said in a sense, "If this is really what the Bible says it is and the Bible is true, then this requires everything of me; this would completely change everything, I would want to give everything to it." Exactly! I think so often we jump in with sharing the gospel with people wanting to have a quick positive response without giving time for people to contemplate the cost or really even explaining the cost in the first place. True faith is a sacrifice of your life, giving your life, surrendering your life and all your rights to everything over to the Lord, making him the ruler of your life willingly as a result of understanding the scope of what Jesus did for us. Our friend recognized this and you could tell it wasn't an easy thing to process, naturally. But he's also made comments about the peace he sees in it.

I was reading in the Bible this morning at the end of John where Jesus asked Peter, "Do you truly love me?" I liked what the notes in the margin explain in regards to love and it fits perfect with our friend's comment on counting the cost. To "truly love" refers to a love in which the entire personality, including the will is involved. We give up our own will for His because we truly love Him, because He truly loved us. This is in effect what our friend was saying. And he didn't even have the notes! Isn't it beautiful and at the same time challenging to see the Word through fresh eyes and to see the Holy Spirit working so marvelously?

Wes's Room, Finally Finished!

After months of dreaming, arranging, rearranging, thinking, planning, quilting, painting, ordering, tying and doing a bit of shopping, I've finally got Wes's room the way I like it. We moved the dresser and mirror far too many times, leaving gaping holes in the walls. I would like to one day cover the chair and get a bit more gender neutral rug but for now they blend well and suit the purpose. And what room would be complete without a baby! Wes is in the crib in these pictures. On the last day of arranging his room, he rode around in the crib adoringly watching his mobile as I shifted it about several times.

The animal alphabet cards were the inspiration for almost everything in the room - paint, curtains, sheets, quilt, dust ruffle, etc. - bought them even before we started the adoption process. I hadn't bought any baby things in the then 3 1/2 years of waiting. That was a particularly sad day and somehow these made me smile and encouraged me not to give up hope so I broke down and bought them. I just put them in a drawer in this room for months. Eventually from these came first the paint color - the room was also painted before knowing about Wes and with the idea of it being a good color for an adult guest room which is what this room was before Wes came to us, and also that it could possibly be a good neutral baby room color. As I look back now, I am not sure how it could work for a girl. I guess God put it in my head there would be a boy before I knew it!

The animal cards were a jumping off point for colors for the quilt I made - which I also started before we knew about Wes but after the adoption paperwork was completed. I had thought about it for months before starting on it. Somehow after all the paperwork was finished, I felt the freedom to go ahead with making it even though we thought it would be many months or even years before we had a baby. I so enjoyed picking out the fabrics and the design. Surprise! Wes came about three weeks after I started putting it together! In our Iphotos, the pictures of the finished quilt top are the last set of photos before Wes came! I finally finished the quilt when he was about 4 months old. It is a bit big for him now. We sometimes use it as a blanket for him for playing on the floor. He'll probably start using it for real when he's a toddler.

These pictures have a two different quotes - the one on the left is a prayer I made out of Ps 92:12 which says, "Lord, may Wesley be a righteous man, flourishing like the palm tree and may he grow like a cedar in Lebanon. Planted in the house of the Lord, may he flourish in your courts. We pray he will still yield fruit in old age,that he will be full of sap and very green, declaring, 'The Lord is upright, He is my Rock and there is no unrighteousness in Him.'" The one on the right says, "Hope shall change to glad fruition; Faith to sight and prayer to praise." It is a verse from a hymn called, Jesus, I my cross have taken.

This is what the room roughly looked like, kind of, before Wes came, except that the fan was installed in the ceiling and we had a few things on the walls.

Professional Pics

Here are some pictures we had taken of Wesley a few weeks ago. Enjoy!

Going Home

I’ve been feeling a bit home sick lately - but for which home I cannot say. I miss Lebanon, I miss Georgia, I miss Oklahoma, - all for different reasons - ministry, old friends, even older friends and family, church, familiar scenery, adventure. We’ve struggled so much here to feel rooted and wondered countless times why God put us here. Sometimes it feels like we are in a holding pattern, like we’re trying to tread water upstream, pushing against some invisible wall, or even like we’ve gone backwards somehow or that we’re stuck. Moving to Lebanon and living there was tough (but worth it!). In some ways this has been even harder but for different reasons. However, if Wesley is our reason for being here, it is all well worth it! This reminded me of a blog entry I wrote at least a year ago but never posted. I read it today and it encouraged me. I thought I would finally post it. So here it is in italics.

I have to admit that over the last 6 years or so, I’ve had trouble knowing where “home” is. I lived in Lebanon for almost a year, then back to Ga for 6 months, then to Oklahoma for about 2 and a half years. Oklahoma became my new permanent home but for some reason I had trouble feeling completely settled there perhaps because of my own restless heart or perhaps because it was so different to me than what “home” had been to me in Ga for 30 years- family close by, friends I had known since elementary school - 20-30 year old friendships, beautiful landscapes and lots of memories. But Oklahoma had one thing Georgia did not and that was my wonderful hubby. It also had a church that offered deep, thorough biblical equiping that I never had but longed for and had prayed for. Eventually, the Lord allowed me to develop lasting, deep, godly friendships there that I know I will have for the rest of me life. This too had been a prayer of mine for years.

Then God put it on our hearts to leave that behind, to move to Lebanon. So we up and sold our house and moved to Lebanon, leaving no physical roots in Ok, except those of our friends and church. Home became South Lebanon for however long God wanted us there. It was difficult to plant any roots there not knowing how long we were going to be there but knowing too that our stay was most likely only a 6-9 month stay - not long enough to make a rented place a home, even though we tried hard to do so. We had to travel back and forth to Beirut a lot while we were there too so this made nesting difficult as well. While on one of our trips to Beirut, we were evacuated from that troubled city to a safer mountain retreat with no idea of being able to return to the friends and the few special possessions we had with us in southern Lebanon that made up our temporary home. We were able to get back to retrieve those things and say proper good-byes to our dear friends but for the remainder of our time there in Lebanon, about 1 month, we had to live with a brother-in Christ in Beirut out of our suitcases. We ached to be down south again with the friends we had made and to be settled.

Upon returning to the US we were not sure what the next step was even though we had been praying about it for months. So we became “sojourners,” “vagabonds,” traveling around the country visiting friends and family, living out of our suitcases for five more months. We wound up back in Norman, OK, our former home, for some semblance of normalcy and familiarity to keep our sanity. (I was slowly melting down at that point.)

I have written all of this to say that God has taught me something about “home” in all this, especially the last 8 months. God had taught me to be contented wherever I am physically for however long that might be, to “bloom where I’m planted,” to make the most of it, to see it as permanent even if it’s not. One thing has really stuck with me that a missionary said to us in Lebanon when we were contemplating buying a microwave. He said, “Wherever you are, plant your tent pegs deep.” We didn’t buy the microwave because it was really not all that suitable for the small amount of electricity our house could handle. However, what he said seemed profound at the time though its meaning took months to fully comprehend by living it out experientially. The idea of the tent implies something temporary - not knowing how long you will be in a place, but planting the pegs deep implies that while you’re there staying grounded, making roots, digging into life there, being fully involved. But at the same time being able to pull up those pegs when God says go without being hindered by too much baggage. I recognize that the older we get, the more we accumulate in things, friends, growing family that make it harder to pull up the pegs.

Another thing I’ve learned, and probably the more important thing is that home does not have to be a tangible place. It is not the stuff you put in your home either. It really is something you can’t touch. It is being with the ones you love, it is being fully in God’s will, it is living life on purpose for Christ no matter what or where, it is completely trusting His sovereignty when many things don’t seem to make sense, it is being completely satisfied and fully rested in Christ, safe in His arms, even if nothing around you feels safe or is safe or familiar or comforting.

Something else I’ve learned is that the Lord never fails us, that His grace is sufficient, He holds us in His hands tightly and that His Word is enough for us and completely reliable. We’ve also learned how much we miss and need and long for fellowship with the body of Christ.

There’s a song entitled Going Home that is part of a compilation one of our Lebanon teammates put together. It says somewhat how I feel. “I’ve been feeling kind of restless, I’ve been feeling out of place. I can hear a distance singing, a song that I can’t write and it echoes in what I’m always trying to say. There’s a feeling I can’t capture. It’s always just a prayer away. I want to know the ending, things hoped for and not seen but I guess that’s the point of hoping anyway. I’m confined by my senses to really know what You are like. You are more than I can fathom, more than I can guess, and more than I can see with human sight. But I have felt You with my spirit, I have felt You fill this room and this is just an invitation, just a sample of the whole and I cannot wait to be going home...Going Home. I’ll meet You at the table, I’ll meet You in the air. You are never to young to think about it. I cannot wait to be going home. Face to face face, how can it be... ”

We will probably never feel fully at home here on this earth. But one day we will be home forever, in our real homes, the homes built and intended for us. We won’t ever feel like sojourners, foreigners, aliens, out of place. We’ll be seated at the table of our dear Father who has adopted us for all eternity to be His sons. How beautiful!