It Is Well - A Real "Let It Go" Song

Here is a true "Let it go song"! I've had to watch Frozen twice to get some of the better points out of it but I still DO NOT like the "Let it go song!"

You have to listen about a third way through to hear the "let it go" part, but it's worth it. This captures the true essence of letting go. Letting go is about letting go of our own control and putting our complete trust in Christ in everything and knowing that in letting go, "it is well with my soul."

This is shared from my friend Chris's play list on Youtube, whose wife, Kelsey went home to Jesus this past July.

Enjoy the other songs on the list too!

No Other Name

The last few days have been very reflective. Losing a close friend really makes you rethink a lot of things and ponder deeply the things you believe and build your life upon. I have had times in my life where I've had to think deeply about my faith because it was profoundly shaken. I am thankful for those times because now I stand on a firm foundation of faith and I haven't had to wrestle so much with God. Though I have wrestled some, God has made many of the truths of the gospel and His character more vivid and real and have given me great comfort - like His grace and love to send a Savior so that our sin doesn't make death a finality but rather is a transition to eternal life face to face with our dear Jesus if we have made Him Lord over our life. Like His sovereignty that has control over all things even when it seems like the effects (like disease and suffering and famine, etc)  of sin are victorious - His purposes are higher than all things and are for our good and His glory. Sin isn't victorious in the end. Jesus Christ wins! It has made me long for heaven more, to be free of sin and sorrow and the mess of this world but also to see a greater purpose for myself on this earth and to recognize that life is super short. I don't want to waste it. I hold the good news of the gospel much more dear now. And I am comfortingly confronted with the bigness and grandness and glory of God.

There is so much more I can say but I'll end there for now. I bought a couple of cds the day after Kelsey's celebration service. One of them is Hillsong's No Other Name. I've listened to it over and over and over because every song exalts the name of Jesus. Here are two songs that I've had on repeat a lot because of their comforting message of who God is and the work that Christ has done on the cross.

No Other Name

One Name holds weight above them all
His Fame outlasts the earth He formed
His praise resounds beyond the stars
And echoes in our hearts
The Greatest One of all

His Face shines brighter than the sun
His Grace as boundless as His love
He Reigns with healing in His wings
The Kind above all kings.
The Greatest One of all

Lift up your eyes see the King has come
Light of the world
Reaching out for us
There is no other Name
There is no other Name
Jesus Christ our God

Seated on high the undefeated One
Mountains bow down as we lift Him up
There is no other Name
There is no other Name
Jesus Christ our God

Find hope when all the world seems lost
Behold the triumph of the cross
His power has trampled death and grave
Our life found in His name
The Greatest Name of all

The earth will shake and tremble before Him
Chains will break as heaven and earth sing
Holy is the Name
Holy is the Name of Jesus, Jesus, Jesus


This I Believe (The Creed)

Our Father everlasting
The all creating One
God Almighty
Through Your Holy Spirit
Conceiving Christ the Son
Jesus our Savior

Our Judge and our Defender
Suffered and crucified
Forgiveness is in You
Descended into Darkness
You rose in glorious light
Forever seated high.

I believe in God our Father
I believe in Christ the Son
I believe in the Holy Spirit
Our God is three in One
I believe in the resurrection
That we will rise again
For I believe in the Name of Jesus
I believe in You.
I believe You rose again
I believe that Jesus Christ is Lord

I believe in life eternal
I believe in the virgin birth
I believe in the saints' communion
And in Your holy Church
I believe in the resurrection
When Jesus comes again
For I believe in the Name of Jesus.

O Holy Night

O Holy Night! The stars are brightly shining,
It is the night of the dear Saviour's birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining.
Till He appeared and the Spirit felt its worth.
A thrill of hope the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees! Oh, hear the angel voices!
O night divine, the night when Christ was born;
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!
O night, O Holy Night , O night divine!

Led by the light of faith serenely beaming,
With glowing hearts by His cradle we stand.
O'er the world a star is sweetly gleaming,
Now come the wisemen from out of the Orient land.
The King of kings lay thus lowly manger;
In all our trials born to be our friends.
He knows our need, our weakness is no stranger,
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!
Behold your King! Before him lowly bend!

Truly He taught us to love one another,
His law is love and His gospel is peace.
Chains he shall break, for the slave is our brother.
And in his name all oppression shall cease.
Sweet hymns of joy in grateful chorus raise we,
With all our hearts we praise His holy name.
Christ is the Lord! Then ever, ever praise we,
His power and glory ever more proclaim!
His power and glory ever more proclaim!

In His Rest

Every time we lay Wesley down for a nap or bedtime we pat him on the back or side for a few minutes to settle him. Lately, I've started patting some and then just resting a slightly firm hand on his back or shoulder or bottom to help settle him more.

The other day I was thinking about this with regards to our walk with Jesus. I know the Bible speaks of resting in Him and of His hand upon us. He wants us to rest in Him but so often I squirm and fuss and try to keep my eyes open so to speak. I think very often in my life God is gently saying, "Shh" to me and pushing a little more with His hand to make me rest in Him. The difference between me patting Wes and putting my hand on him and God's hand on us is that I don't stay there for his entire nap! However, God's hand is always upon us. He is so trustworthy and such a good, good Father. I pray that I won't fight against Him so much with my fears, worries, anxieties, complaints, fussing and my tendency to need to be in control of all things at all times. I think God is seriously trying to break me of that and to trust and rest in Him always.

Here's a song we sang in church a few weeks ago. The words are quite fitting for our life right now.

Petition - Anne Steele, Sandra McCracken, Chelsey Scott

"Give me a calm, a thankful heart,

From every murmur free,

The blessings of thy grace impart,

And make me live to Thee.

You raise your hand to still the storms

That rage inside my head;

Revive my heart with gratitude,

Love, quell my doubt and dread.

Give me a sure and rested soul,

From every fear relieved,

Thy Spirit's power and presence mine,

To ever comfort me."

Going Home

I’ve been feeling a bit home sick lately - but for which home I cannot say. I miss Lebanon, I miss Georgia, I miss Oklahoma, - all for different reasons - ministry, old friends, even older friends and family, church, familiar scenery, adventure. We’ve struggled so much here to feel rooted and wondered countless times why God put us here. Sometimes it feels like we are in a holding pattern, like we’re trying to tread water upstream, pushing against some invisible wall, or even like we’ve gone backwards somehow or that we’re stuck. Moving to Lebanon and living there was tough (but worth it!). In some ways this has been even harder but for different reasons. However, if Wesley is our reason for being here, it is all well worth it! This reminded me of a blog entry I wrote at least a year ago but never posted. I read it today and it encouraged me. I thought I would finally post it. So here it is in italics.

I have to admit that over the last 6 years or so, I’ve had trouble knowing where “home” is. I lived in Lebanon for almost a year, then back to Ga for 6 months, then to Oklahoma for about 2 and a half years. Oklahoma became my new permanent home but for some reason I had trouble feeling completely settled there perhaps because of my own restless heart or perhaps because it was so different to me than what “home” had been to me in Ga for 30 years- family close by, friends I had known since elementary school - 20-30 year old friendships, beautiful landscapes and lots of memories. But Oklahoma had one thing Georgia did not and that was my wonderful hubby. It also had a church that offered deep, thorough biblical equiping that I never had but longed for and had prayed for. Eventually, the Lord allowed me to develop lasting, deep, godly friendships there that I know I will have for the rest of me life. This too had been a prayer of mine for years.

Then God put it on our hearts to leave that behind, to move to Lebanon. So we up and sold our house and moved to Lebanon, leaving no physical roots in Ok, except those of our friends and church. Home became South Lebanon for however long God wanted us there. It was difficult to plant any roots there not knowing how long we were going to be there but knowing too that our stay was most likely only a 6-9 month stay - not long enough to make a rented place a home, even though we tried hard to do so. We had to travel back and forth to Beirut a lot while we were there too so this made nesting difficult as well. While on one of our trips to Beirut, we were evacuated from that troubled city to a safer mountain retreat with no idea of being able to return to the friends and the few special possessions we had with us in southern Lebanon that made up our temporary home. We were able to get back to retrieve those things and say proper good-byes to our dear friends but for the remainder of our time there in Lebanon, about 1 month, we had to live with a brother-in Christ in Beirut out of our suitcases. We ached to be down south again with the friends we had made and to be settled.

Upon returning to the US we were not sure what the next step was even though we had been praying about it for months. So we became “sojourners,” “vagabonds,” traveling around the country visiting friends and family, living out of our suitcases for five more months. We wound up back in Norman, OK, our former home, for some semblance of normalcy and familiarity to keep our sanity. (I was slowly melting down at that point.)

I have written all of this to say that God has taught me something about “home” in all this, especially the last 8 months. God had taught me to be contented wherever I am physically for however long that might be, to “bloom where I’m planted,” to make the most of it, to see it as permanent even if it’s not. One thing has really stuck with me that a missionary said to us in Lebanon when we were contemplating buying a microwave. He said, “Wherever you are, plant your tent pegs deep.” We didn’t buy the microwave because it was really not all that suitable for the small amount of electricity our house could handle. However, what he said seemed profound at the time though its meaning took months to fully comprehend by living it out experientially. The idea of the tent implies something temporary - not knowing how long you will be in a place, but planting the pegs deep implies that while you’re there staying grounded, making roots, digging into life there, being fully involved. But at the same time being able to pull up those pegs when God says go without being hindered by too much baggage. I recognize that the older we get, the more we accumulate in things, friends, growing family that make it harder to pull up the pegs.

Another thing I’ve learned, and probably the more important thing is that home does not have to be a tangible place. It is not the stuff you put in your home either. It really is something you can’t touch. It is being with the ones you love, it is being fully in God’s will, it is living life on purpose for Christ no matter what or where, it is completely trusting His sovereignty when many things don’t seem to make sense, it is being completely satisfied and fully rested in Christ, safe in His arms, even if nothing around you feels safe or is safe or familiar or comforting.

Something else I’ve learned is that the Lord never fails us, that His grace is sufficient, He holds us in His hands tightly and that His Word is enough for us and completely reliable. We’ve also learned how much we miss and need and long for fellowship with the body of Christ.

There’s a song entitled Going Home that is part of a compilation one of our Lebanon teammates put together. It says somewhat how I feel. “I’ve been feeling kind of restless, I’ve been feeling out of place. I can hear a distance singing, a song that I can’t write and it echoes in what I’m always trying to say. There’s a feeling I can’t capture. It’s always just a prayer away. I want to know the ending, things hoped for and not seen but I guess that’s the point of hoping anyway. I’m confined by my senses to really know what You are like. You are more than I can fathom, more than I can guess, and more than I can see with human sight. But I have felt You with my spirit, I have felt You fill this room and this is just an invitation, just a sample of the whole and I cannot wait to be going home...Going Home. I’ll meet You at the table, I’ll meet You in the air. You are never to young to think about it. I cannot wait to be going home. Face to face face, how can it be... ”

We will probably never feel fully at home here on this earth. But one day we will be home forever, in our real homes, the homes built and intended for us. We won’t ever feel like sojourners, foreigners, aliens, out of place. We’ll be seated at the table of our dear Father who has adopted us for all eternity to be His sons. How beautiful!

Remembering and Glorifying

A few weeks ago, the sermon in church, focused on seeking satisfaction in God. The guest speaker pointed out ways that we can become one who loves God more than life, completely satisfied in Him, consumed with a holy passion for God. One of those ways was to remember what God has done in the past. We encourage remembering in our lives by writing down what God has done, meditating on it, reviewing it and frequently telling others. This in turn fuels satisfaction in Him. God reminded me of a big something today and put some more pieces together for me so I thought I would share it with you as a means to help me remember even more that I might be more satisfied in Him and Him be more glorified in me.

God usually reminds me of His past work in my life through songs. There is just something about a song that tunes my heart to Him in a different way than anything else, especially if I am reading the Bible while I am listening to music. (That is why I have posted so many entries with songs!) So, this afternoon I was being a bit crafty and listening to some Keith Green music. I decided that it would a good time to memorize some verses while I was cutting and gluing. Sure enough, as I had the Bible open while listening to some poignant words of praise, God reminded me of a specific time in my life that I am realizing more and more was one of those major pivotal points in my walk with the Lord from which many other things stem.

It was mid October 2001. That day I had been volunteering in New York City with the Salvation Army along with some others from my church in Georgia. We were assigned the task of listening to some of the victims of the 9/11 attacks in order to determine ways to help them, whether that be just with a hug, with financial help or with counseling. It was a really tough day. That night I spent some time journaling and felt burdened in my heart to pray to really, really know the Lord, deeply. I asked Him to reveal more of His character to me, to grow me so much more. He heard me and was faithful to be begin to answer in less than 18 hours.

The next day I worked at "ground zero." The day before we had walked around the perimeter trying to put some pieces of the tragic event together and pray. It was difficult to hold back the tears then. However, walking into its interior was quite a different experience. The destruction and smell of death were beyond description and terrified me.

In those moments as we slowly made our way into the heart of those 16 acres I literally felt my knees begin to buckle. We had come to bring smiles, compassion, warm hearts, listening ears, food and practical help to the men working there. What good would I be if, after only 10 minutes of trudging through the muck, I was about to pass out or lose my lunch? I prayed quickly for God to give me what I needed in order to do what He had brought me there to do. He immediately strengthened me and, in a way, numbed me to everything that overwhelmed my senses. He gave me some neat and unique opportunities that night to just be a light and be the "sweet aroma of the knowledge of Him" in that place.

The Lord taught me a great many things on that night and other times I spent there. But one thing stands out the most. Those first terrifying steps on that gray October day began a years-long journey deeper into the heart of God's character. Was I terrified of what more the terrorists could do? No, I was terrified of God. If man could devise such unspeakable destruction of enormous man-made structures and of man, what could God in His wrath and power do? My little Sunday School image of God was blown to pieces very quickly. I had God wrapped up in a little box of love, mercy and grace, someone to whom I could run to and crawl in His lap. I was confronted with some very different aspects of God's character like His wrath, His sovereignty, His justice and His power that I had seldom even thought to explore and as I wrote above, I was terrified. God, in future months and years-even up to the present day, would require that I not just explore but grapple and wrestle with who He really is and what He is really about as well as confront ugly things in my own heart. I asked for it. He took me seriously. And praise God!

Little did I know at the time what would be required of me. I am understanding more and more that in order to know God more I have to relinquish myself. I see now that much of my experiences since 10/01, stem from that prayer and have been an exercise in surrendering more of myself to Him, making my life more about Him and less about myself. I have found such freedom and peace in this and much of the insecurities I used to struggle with have dissolved. Inevitably as I do give up more of myself, He fills in the gaps with more understanding of who He is.

Also in discovering and digging deeper into the hard things of God's character, He's given me a fuller and richer understanding of God's love, grace and mercy in relationship to the other aspects of His character. This in turn gives me all the more reason to praise Him because I understand that He is all the more worthy. Not that my understanding of Him makes Him more worthy but my knowing Him better shows me more of His worthiness to be praised.

The journey, often difficult but filled with blessings, has completely transformed my whole life, my understanding of the Lord, how I think, how I desire to spend my days. I recognize now, more and more, that much of what I've experienced in my life since that day is a result of His faithfulness to reveal more of Himself to me and thus breaking me of myself. I barely knew what it meant to glorify God eight years ago but now as I remember God and what He has done in my life in order to give Him glory I see how understanding Him more only draws me to give Him glory and I delight in it all the more.

Here's the song that caused me to remember. Aspects of it made me think of what I prayed that night. Praise God for His faithfulness!

Rushing Wind by Keith Green

Rushing wind blow through this temple,

blowing out the dust within,

Come and breath Your breath upon me;

I've been born again.

Holy Spirit, I surrender.

Take me where You want to go

Plant me by Your living waters

Plant me deep so I can grow.

Jesus, You're the One

Who set my spirit free.

Use me Lord,

Glory Your holy name through me.

Separate me from this world Lord,

Sanctify my life for You

Daily change me to Your image.

Help me bear good fruit.

Everyday You're drawing closer

Trials come to test my faith

But when all is said and done

You know, its been worth the wait.

Jesus, You're the One

who set my spirit free

Use me Lord

Glorify Your holy name through me.

Rushing wind blow through this temple,

blowing out the dust within,

Come and breath Your breath upon me

I've been born again.

Jesus, Draw Me Ever Nearer

I've been thinking of putting this on my blog for a long time now - at least a year and a half! My how time flies! This is a song that I listened to in Lebanon over and over and over again because of what was going on in my own heart regarding starting a family as well as because of some of the stress of living in Lebanon and the difficult transition over the last year (though I wouldn't change a bit of any of it). For some reason, perhaps because there is so much emotion wrapped up in it, I just haven't been able to post this song. When I hear it, it is like I feel a tenderness with Christ and share something really special with Him that no one else could know. I have listened to it and wept uncontrollably and at other times with great joy though even now I struggle to listen to it without tears welling up and memories flooding my mind. It has encouraged me so much. It gives me such great hope and I have found that the "journey" has brought so many blessings, the 3 greatest being that there is a sweetness with Christ that I've never known before (He really has drawn me nearer), I have an unexplainable peace and I feel more in love with Eric than I ever thought I could love someone. Though I'm a little worn and the journey is a little scary sometimes, where He leads, I follow, gladly, with anticipation though admittedly sometimes with a bit of hesitation. "What's around the next bend, Lord? Dare I ask? .................. Oh yes!"

Jesus, draw me ever nearer

As I labor through the storm.

You have called me to this passing

and I follow, though I'm worn.

[Chorus]

May this journey bring a blessing

May I rise on wings of faith

And at the end of my heart's testing

With your likeness, let me wake

Jesus, guide me through the tempest

Keep my spirit staid and sure

When the midnight meets the morning

Let me love you even more.

[Chorus]

Let the treasure of the trial

form within me as I go

And at the end of this long passing

Let me leave them at your throne.

May this journey bring a blessing

may I rise on wings of faith

And at the end of my heart's testing

With your likeness, let me wake.

This song is found on the Keith and Kristen Gettys cd - "In Christ Alone." Great friends gave us this cd just a couple of weeks before we left for Lebanon and it was one of the greatest blessings while we were there and since we've been back. Like I said earlier, not just that one song above, but all the songs at different times get played over and over. Try it out. I know you won't be disappointed.

Hallelujah! What a Savior!

For a while, I didn’t like hymns to much. They seemed dull and stuffy. Now I adore them. The words are so beautiful and deep. I really like to play them on my trumpet every now and then. Here are a few commemorating our risen Savior and the salvation He has given to us. 

Hallelujah! What a Savior! (Philip Bliss, 1875)

Man of Sorrows! What a name for the Son of God who came

ruined sinners to reclaim. Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Bearing shame and scoffing rude, in my place condemned he stood;

sealed my pardon with his blood. Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Guilty, vile and helpless we; spotless Lamb of God was he;

full atonement can it be? Hallelujah! What a Savior!

Lifted up was he to die; “It is finished!” was his cry;

now in heaven exalted high. Hallelujah! What a Savior!

When he comes, our glorious King, all his ransomed home to bring, then anew this song we’ll sing. Hallelujah! What a Savior!

____________________________________________________________

When I survey the wondrous cross  (Isaac Watts 1674-1748)

When I survey the wondrous cross On which the Prince of Glory died, My richest gain I count but loss, and pour contempt on all my pride.

Forbid it, Lord, that I should boast, Save in the death of Christ my God; All the vain things that charm me most, I sacrifice them to his blood.

See, from his head, his hands, his feet, Sorrow and love flow mingled down; Did e’er such love and sorrow meet, Or thorns compose so rich a crown. 

Were the whole realm of nature mine, That were an offering fare too small; Love so amazing, so divine, Demands my soul, my life, my all. 

____________________________________________________________

 (We listened to these last two so much in Lebanon! I cannot hear these without crying.)

The Power of the Cross  (Stuart Townend)

Oh, to see the dawn of darkest day, Christ on the road to Calvary

Tried by sinful man, torn and beaten there, nailed to a cross of wood. This the power of the cross, Christ became sin for us, took the blame, bore the wrath, we stand forgiven at the cross. 

Oh, to see the pain written on your face bearing the awesome weight of sin. Every bitter thought, every evil deed, crowing your blood stained brow. This, the power of the cross, Christ became sin for us, took the blame, bore the wrath, we stand forgiven at the cross.

Now the daylight flees, now the ground beneath quakes as its maker bows his head. Curtain torn in two, dead are raised to life, “Finished, ”the victory cry! This the power of the cross, Christ became sin for us, took the blame, bore the wrath, we stand forgiven at the cross.

Oh, to see my name written in the wounds, for through your suffering I am free. Death is death crushed to death. life is mine to live, what through your selfless love. This the power of the cross, Son of God, slain for us, What a love! What a cross! We stand forgiven at the cross. 

Beneath the Cross  (Keith and Kristyn Getty)

Beneath the cross of Jesus I find a place to stand 

And wonder at such mercy that calls me as I am. 

For hands should that should discard me, 

hold me wounds which tell me come. 

Beneath the cross of Jesus my unworthy soul is won.

Beneath the cross of Jesus, His family is my own. 

Once strangers chasing selfish dreams now one through grace alone. How could I now dishonor the ones that you have loved. 

Beneath the cross of Jesus see the children called by God. 

Beneath the cross of Jesus the path before the crown, 

we follow in his footsteps where promised Hope is found.

 How great the joy before us, to be his perfect bride. 

Beneath the cross of Jesus we will gladly live our lives.

Unless You're Here

This is a song by Jamie Smith that I have really enjoyed over the last 6 months or so. Thought I would share the words with you. Enjoy!

Chaos surrounds me, unless You’re here

My heart has nothing, unless You’re here.

The blind lead the blind, unless You’re here.

My dreams are left behind, unless You’re here.

[Refrain] But there’s hope not just for tomorrow but for today, while Your mercy takes the sorrow as you show us with your grace that You’re here.

Our debt remains unpaid, unless You’re here

Our joy quickly fades, unless You’re here.

Songs have no meaning, unless You’re here.

No reason for singing, unless You’re here.

[Refrain]

Hearts will not be changed, unless You’re here.

Hope pursued in vain, unless You’re here.

My best will never do, unless You’re here.

Cause it would not include You, unless You’re here.

[Refrain]