Lessons Learned As A New Mom - Part 2

Here is the second part of my four part series on things I've learned as a new mom. I hope you find these encouraging.

3. Don’t compare your babies with other babies, negatively or positively - Love and accept your little one as is with big smiles, hugs and kisses and do the same for other babies too! Your little one is an individual valued by the Lord. He didn’t make the one you hold to be like you or Daddy, or if adopted, like their birthmom and dad. They are their own unique creation, with their own personality. There is no one else like him or her - never has been and never will be. Guide them, pray for them and love them as such.

4. Don’t compare yourself to other moms, negatively or positively - this has been a huge downfall of mine and mostly with moms that I don’t even know. I tend to compare myself with supermom bloggers who have x number of kids more than me and find time to write beautiful, encouraging and inspiring blog entries and books, run a B&B, keep a clean house, make & cook healthy, frugal menus, shop at co-ops, farms and various other places just for food, homeschool, volunteer, lead bible studies, have small groups in their home, declutter, march through each day with a routine they actually keep, bake bread, soak grains, grind their own grain, keep a garden where things actually grow and some even live on farms and do these things all while presenting a life free of stress and full of tranquility, joy and simplicity!!!!!! I don’t mean to sound like I don’t like the ladies who write the blogs I read. I think I’d be good friends with them and I have really learned a lot from them. It is my own fault for trying to compare myself to them or to be them.

Also, I’ve tended to try to be like Caroline Ingalls, Abigail Adams and Elizabeth Elliot’s mother wrapped up all in one in eras of time when life was far more difficult and isolating without modern conveniences and technology. I find myself thinking, “What did so and so do?” or “How did she do this?” Or better yet, “How do any of these ladies do any of these things???” “Why can’t I be like them?” Since then I’ve realized that what we see of these people (bloggers and historical figures) are mostly snapshots of a life or are written from what a child or neighbor or friend remembers or what historians can dig up. We can’t get into their brain to know what they really thought or felt. I would love to write a book about what Abigail Adams’ day really looked like, as well of other ladies who lived centuries ago, if it is possible to really find that information. They wrote letters to people. Abigail wrote thousands of letters, but she probably didn’t write about her laundry and how she couldn’t get Charles to take a nap or how she hated to clean dishes all day long, only to find a new pile a few hours later.

Summary: I am not any of these women. I have to move through my days as God made me, pursuing the life He’s desiring for me to live and be a good steward of that. I’ve had to learn to enjoy them, glean encouragement and wisdom from them and to stop comparing myself and instead value who God made me to be.