Jesus, I My Cross Have Taken

This time ten years ago, I was getting ready to travel to Belarus to live for 9 weeks during the summer. I was so thrilled! I had spent two weeks there the summer before and felt confident about this trip - that it wouldn't be too hard. Boy was I wrong! Those were some lonely, cold, tough days. But that trip sparked a new chapter in my life, like a page turned. On that trip, God started to peel away at some things that I did not even know existed in my heart, revealing some nasty stuff I needed to be rid of and some truths I needed to understand about myself and about God ... and He has continued to do so ever since in a myriad of ways. So many things have happened in my life since that time and He's used all of them to continue to peel and teach and love. It is simply too much to comprehend all that God has allowed me to see and do and even to "go through." I've traveled to at least 9 countries since then and countless states, lived in three states and one other country - twice, gotten married, adopted the cutest little boy ever, got a Master's, studied three languages (one of which I have almost completely forgotten), learned to cook and knit, been on some hair-raising adventures, seen some wonderful history, met the neatest, godliest people, heard the most amazing stories and seen God do what only He could do - not in any particular order. I am simply astounded by the privilege of being able to be a part of what God is doing in so many places and in so many ways. While many of these things carried such blessing, some of them brought tears too, mostly because of something I had to work through or deal with. And so, I am humbled by the privilege to sit at His feet and learn and grow and understand through the good times and the difficult.

Someone asked me not too long ago if it was worth the wait for Wesley, if it made the time we did wait disappear. To the second question, no. The time - 4 1/2 years - still seems long. But to the first question, a resounding yes! And not simply because we now have Wesley but because of all the other treasures God has given along the way that at first didn't seem so treasurable but now are so sweet - they were even sweet before Wes came. These ten years have made a profound, life changing impact on my life and my relationship with God, for the better. Praise God for these! Though the road has been bumpy and mountainous at times it was all SO WORTH IT! I wonder what the next ten years will be like?

We were visiting a church this past weekend that played this song in worship. I had never heard it but almost immediately it plucked my heartstrings and I began to cry - if you know me well you know this is not too uncommon. : ) It says so much about what God has taught me through these 10 years - not what I think I am, but what my heart attitude should be - most especially the first, fourth and fifth verses. And it speaks it so beautifully and joyfully which makes it all the better to me. If you would like to actually hear this song, there is a link at the bottom you can click on. I think it would be well worth it to do so.

Jesus, I my cross have taken,

All to leave and follow Thee.

Destitute, despised, forsaken,

Thou from hence my all shall be.

Perish every fond ambition,

All I've sought or hoped or known.

Yet how rich is my condition!

God and heaven are still my own.

Let the world despise and leave me,

They have left my Savior, too.

Human hearts and looks deceive me;

Thou art not, like them, untrue.

O while Thou dost smile upon me,

God of wisdom, love and might,

Foes may hate and friends disown me,

Show thy face and all is bright.

Man may trouble and distress me,

Twill but drive me to Thy breast.

Life with trials hard may press me;

Heaven will bring me sweeter rest.

Oh, 'tis not in grief to harm me

While thy love is left to me;

Oh, 'twere not in joy to charm me.

Were that joy unmixed with Thee.

Go, then earthly fame and treasure,

Come disaster, scorn and pain

In Thy service, pain is pleasure,

With Thy favor, loss is gain

I have called Thee Abba Father,

I have stayed my heart on Thee

Storms may howl, and clouds may gather;

All must work for good to me. (Romans 8:28)

Soul, then know thy full salvation

Rise o'er sin and fear and care

Joy to find in every station,

Something still to do or bear.

Think what Spirit dwells within thee,

Think what Father's smiles are thine,

Think that Jesus died to win thee,

Child of heaven, canst thou repine?

Haste thee on from grace to glory,

Armed by faith, and winged by prayer.

Heaven's eternal days before thee,

God's own hand shall guide us there.

Soon shall close thy earthly mission,

Soon shall pass thy pilgrim days,

Hope shall change to glad fruition,

Faith to sight, and prayer to praise.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3iU8yXzsejc&feature=related

Our Teeny, Tiny Taylor

We are rejoicing in the gift from the Lord of our precious son, Wesley Joseph Taylor.

He has come to us quite quickly! On February 23, the social worker called to tell us we had been chosen by a birth mom to adopt her baby boy that was already born. We met the birth mom the next day and proceeded to go forward with adoption. After a week and a half of somewhat controlled chaos and the gamut of emotions, Wesley was placed in our arms for good yesterday, March 5 (with the exception of a few legal formalities a few months down the road).

Little Wesley was born on February 16, 2010. Since he was around 7 weeks early, at birth he weighed it at a whopping 4 lbs 8 oz. He stayed in the hospital for 10 days to ensure he could take a bottle for a full feeding on his own and maintain his body temperature. He has done incredibly well and is so beautiful! At his first doctor's appointment this week he weighed 4 lbs 12 oz. It is so remarkable watch something so tiny and helpless chug down his bottle with a fair amount of ease (once we figured out the right nipple and bottle size for the little guy).We've yet to really hear him cry. He just sounds like a quiet little bleating lamb. I know this will change soon but it is very sweet nonetheless.

Here are some pictures for you to enjoy!

This Year in Pictures

I hardly ever post pictures or write about my everyday life so I thought I would make up for it today!

Enjoy a walk through our year in pictures.

We did a ton of work on the house this year!

The insulation monster tried to eat me!

Eric being the handyman. We had to take up all these boards in the attic to put down more insulation so we would be warmer this winter. It is working so far! It was worth the clogged up lungs and furry bodies.

I have painted almost every room in the house! Pardon my backside!

Eric's parents helped us a lot. Here, Doug is examining his work in our closet. It turned out great!

Which color do I choose? I picked one of these colors for one of our bedrooms.

Some great friends came to visit! Here I'm trying to ice skate with Jen and Lily.

It snowed & snowed!

I tried some gardening... from this to ....

this... to....

THIS!!! I had no idea these things could get so big!!! And they got even bigger!!! I grew all kinds of peppers, broccoli, brussels sprouts, peas, green beans, lettuce, squash & zucchini. I planted a lot of herbs in pots as well. It was so much fun!

Also, I visited with friends in Beaufort, South Carolina.

I love live oaks!!! Beaufort is teeming with them!

Then, my sister got married!! :) It was a gorgeous wedding! Welcome to the family, Joey! :)

In November, we went to Arizona to visit a friend who has a ministry for refugees. We helped with an English camp that weekend. It was great fun! Thanks, Cherie!!!

We enjoyed the beauty of our area and discovered some great parks.

A great Christmas picture!

Sick at Christmas. :( We got this recliner and its match at a garage sale for $10 total! We need to do a bit of work on them as you can tell and they don't match our walls but they are comfy. Cricket especially likes them!

And... it snowed some more! We had a very, very white Christmas and in fact, it's snowing right now! :)

So this ends the photo tour. There are so many more pictures that I had to leave out! I will try to post more throughout the year instead of putting them all up on one day. There are two big things we couldn't really take pictures of that we want to celebrate!

1) We finally found a church that we are excited to join!

2) We've finished all the paperwork for adoption and are now just waiting for a phone call that says, "We have a baby for you!" So you could say we are "expecting" or that we are "paper pregnant." We are very excited!

Hope you had a wonderful Christmas and we wish you all a very Happy New Year!

Scripture Storyline

Are you looking forward to the New Year? Would you like to start it out with a new Bible reading plan? The pastor of our church has worked long and hard on a year-long Bible reading plan that gives commentary and application for each day that you read. Thought-provoking and well-written, it is an excellent way to start the year and to encourage a daily time with the Lord.

Enjoy! Here is the link: http://www.scripturestoryline.com/

Some Thoughts on Freedom

Over the last few years I've been reading a lot about the period of the American Revolution. I've been curious how the ideas of freedom as the 'founding fathers' saw it, i.e, the individual rights of man as well as a collective political and social freedom, match with what the Bible says with regard to freedom and our rights.

I've discovered through my reading that many of the founding fathers, even those who were professed atheists or deists, saw the definite need for virtue within a society and on an individual level in order for personal, political and social liberty to succeed within the context of a democratic or republican government. Our freedom cannot stand without a sense of social decency and respect for fellow citizens, otherwise we infringe on their freedom. Our freedom cannot be at the expense of someone else. It is a sacrificial freedom, one that gives sacrificially on an individual level as well as a societal level for the good of all so that liberty is maintained. Complete freedom to do and say as we please on an individual and corporate level will be the undoing of a republic. For a democratic republic to work there must be a give and take of freedom for the good of the whole. It requires responsibility and selflessness. These virtues sometimes limit freedom on an individual level but for the whole, freedom continues.

I've been reading through I Corinthians via the Scripture Storyline and have discovered the very same principles laid out by Paul. There was a debate about whether it was permissible as believers to eat the meat sacrificed to idols. In summary, Paul agrees that we have the freedom in Christ to eat whatever meat or to drink what we desire but we must ask ourselves if it is beneficial or helpful to the rest of the body of Christ? Will someone else in the body be bound and strangled by your freedom? The goal is not to do as you please now that you are in Christ but to help the body of Christ to grow in maturity and unity and love and to draw others to Christ. We must be careful with the freedom given to us through grace. We must be willing to give up what we think is permissible for the sake of a brother or sister in Christ. Paul had experienced immense hardship for the sake of the body of Christ and so that some might be saved. Think of what Christ gave up for our sakes! Our focus should not be on ourselves and what we are free to do in Christ but on Christ Himself and be willing to lay down our rights and freedoms so that someone else may be free in Christ and grow to maturity unhindered.

So whether it be for the sake of a nation or for the sake of the body of Christ and a person's salvation, we must be careful and selfless with our freedom. It is not to be taken lightly and not to be had at the expense of someone else's liberty.

You Are Not Your Own

Here is an excerpt from Oswald Chamber's "My Utmost for His Highest.," Nov. 1. It summarized a lot of what I 've been learning and wanted to share it with you. Blessings!

"Ye Are Not Your Own." 1 Cor. 6:19

"There is no such thing as a private life - 'a world within the world' - for a man or woman who is brought into fellowship with Jesus Christ's sufferings. God breaks up the private life of His saints, and makes it a thoroughfare for the world on the one hand and for Himself on the other. No human being can stand that unless he is identified with Jesus Christ. We are not sanctified for ourselves, we are called into the fellowship of the gospel, and things happen which have nothing to do with us, God is getting us into fellowship with Himself. Let Him have His way; if you do not, instead of being of the slightest us to God in His redemptive work in the world, you will be a hindrance and a clog.

"The first thing God does with us is to get us based on rugged Reality until we do not care what becomes of us individually as long as He gets His way for the purpose of His redemption. Why shouldn't we go through heartbreaks? Through those doorways God is opening up ways of fellowship with His Son. Most of us fall and collapse at the first grip of pain; we sit down on the threshold of God's purpose and die away of self-pity, and all so-called Christian sympathy will aid us to our death bed. But God will not. He comes with the grip of the pierced hand of His Son, and says - 'Enter into fellowship with Me; arise and shine.' If through a broken heart God can bring His purposes to pass in the world, then thank Him for breaking your heart."

a Small Note on Prayer

I read something in the Tim Keller study on the book of Mark this morning that I thought I would share with you.

Direction in Prayer:

"Jesus' prayer [in the garden] is a model. a) He is honest about his needs and feelings (let this cup pass from me). There is no 'denial' - no effort to say the 'proper Christian thing.' Wonderful spiritual reality. He lets his heart's desire be known. But, b) he shows the goal of prayer is not to bend God's will to ours but to conform our will to God's He is after strength and will to do God's will. Now real prayer will have both honest pouring out of the heart and yet an unwavering spirit of submission. To lack the former makes prayer superficial; to lack the latter makes prayer selfish.